Twenty-five years ago, Carl and I got married, and what a day we had!
It poured with rain all day, though my half-French husband-to-be assured me that this, according to the French, was a sign of good luck… and he was right!
As a headteacher at the time, we had half of my school at the church cheering us on. The other half of the school, like most of the groom’s men, were watching Chelsea and Arsenal play; luckily they made it to the church in time for the ceremony, where my mum gave me away.
We had Sri Lankan curry for our wedding lunch and French cheese and wine in the evening. We put all our favourite tunes together on a playlist and danced the night away at the disco we organised.
At the end of the night, we cleared away the chairs and tables and swept the hall before being ushered away for our honeymoon.
Needless to say, it was a wedding that was unusual in many ways, but above all, it was fun.
This weekend, as we approached our silver anniversary, we decided to replicate one of our wedding photos. I was so proud to get my dress back on. I didn’t get to do up all the 21 hand made buttons on the back, but halfway was pretty good in my book.
The dress was lovingly made by my wonderful mother. As I ironed out the creases, I noticed the little touches she had put in, her handmade label, the tiny blue ribbon in the lining and the meticulous stitches that made me treasure this dress for so long. I have decided that I want to be buried in it! No orchids for my 25th weekend bouquet, so instead my beautiful hydrangeas from the garden, which we used to decorate the wedding tables on the day.
So what is the secret to a long-lasting relationship?
Well that’s easy. It is to recognise that we each are very individual people, we have our own likes and dislikes, our own strengths and our own weaknesses. We are individually creative in our own right, but can also come together to create something greater than the sum of its parts.
And of course – I get the first word.
Over to you, Carl!
It was indeed a day to remember. I’ve been to a lot of weddings, before and since, but I think ours has to be my favourite. And not in a “no, my kid really is special” sort of way; it was objectively the best one. Prove me wrong.
Our wedding was a historic occasion. I clearly recall Kanu’s 3rd, from the by-line, where he channelled Keanu in the Matrix, seemingly defying the laws of physics and overhauling Arsenal’s 2 goal deficit. I don’t recall it because I was watching alongside three quarters of my wedding guests, you understand, but because each and every one of them took enormous delight in describing it to me, a Chelsea fan, when they eventually rolled out of the pub. If I ever forget my anniversary date, all I have to do is look up Kanu 3, Chelsea 2.
Even the run-up to our wedding was excellent; a couple of weeks before the wedding we extensively blind tasted a whole range of different wonderful wines at my parents’ place in Honfleur, and served the best of the bunch, a lively Cremant d’Alsace, along with a Saumur Champigny, at the reception. At least, I think they were the best; the taste test did get a bit confusing after the first dozen or so bottles.
Convention was for suckers; our wedding broke new ground. In addition to the reception’s very best woman, Sam, I had a best woman alongside my best man, so I had double the amount of scurrilous tall tales told about me during their speeches. Those were only capped by my dad’s soliloquy, and an epic dance with him to Play That Funky Music White Boy that I’m still recovering from.
Best. Wedding. Ever.
The secret to a long-lasting relationship, you ask?
Mix equal parts patience, tolerance, and selflessness with a heady blend of adoration, respect and deep, deep love. Blend over the years until golden, and serve with a garnish of fruit and spice. Oh, and noise-cancelling headphones can come in handy too.
Cheers!
PS: For perhaps the first time in 25 years, I’d like to take this unique opportunity to have the last word.
#relationshipmagic #25anniversary #last word
